I Miss Smoking-10 Minute Exercise

45I miss smoking like a dead aunt.

It made me feel so grown up and when I took a drag off a cigarette, when the smoke bounced down to the very pit of my lungs, I felt like I was bumping into eternity. The greatest satisfaction every achieved for me physically was having a cigarette after a big lasagna dinner. The cult of smoking is hypnotic with the matches from strange bars, lighters, ashtrays, the plastic wrap around the cigarette pack (which was always convenient to store secret things in). I was dedicated to smoking. I was a responsible smoker: I always carried 2 lighters and an extra pack of cigarettes. I hated it when people asked me for cigarettes. First of all they are expensive and second, I had planned for ME. Only me. I had enough smoking supplies to last a day beyond whatever situation I was in. It's like those people who hike the Appalachian Trail and have just enough food for themselves, for their own survival. I hate those people that slime around and ask for cigarettes. Man up and go to the store and spend your own money.
I miss smoking. I love the smell of it. And guaranteed if I find out I'm dying, the first thing I will do is go to the store and buy enough cigarettes for the rest of my life. I won't give anyone any of them. What kind of fucking person would want to take a cigarette from a dying woman anyway?